Manic, frantic, panicked

Happy birthday Thursday

2009-05-13T23:04:46Z

Unless I am incorrectificacious, tomorrow is your birthday, my flower. I hope that you have a superb birthday and that your kids bring you smiles. Happy birthday sweets !

Another scorpion !

2009-04-08T02:44:26Z

I killed another scorpion at my folks' house today. This one was much smaller, but startled me nonetheless. It was hidden under a large plate sitting atop a brick border for her rose garden. Anyhow, it will not be doing any stinging.

Just another frantic Friday

2009-04-03T13:57:04Z

Not really, just wanted to spoof the song. I am depressed, but I think it is physical from lack of sleep and allergies mostly. Here are some random observations and thoughts, as I am too scattered (been up since way before 5 am after being up too late) :

• Saw a heron the other day. I do not see a lot of them, as I am in the heart of the city, but it was swooping down onto the large canal we were driving past.

• Pad thai rocks. I am becoming more of an addict daily.

• Less internet time can be a good thing. Have spent a little more time with good books lately. Funny that I could almost forget how wonderful reading is.

• Might have a little something-something with some rhyme online soon. Got some notes together after watching an old movie and am getting a little bit of the itch.

That's all for the moment... though I will be posting again soon.... hopefully after some sleep LOL.

Bleh !

2009-03-12T21:40:23Z

Coughing, hacking, sneezing, shivering, shaking, sweating miserable ass cold is kicking my ass. Damn I hate this crap.

Almost summer LOL

2009-02-27T03:24:59Z

Even for here, 85° highs in February are strange, and this looks like a strange year indeed. Yesterday I dug a couple holes at Mom's house and helped her plant two rose bushes,. The soil at her house is so hard and devoid of nutrition that I had to dig them oversized and replace the dirt that came out with a blend of organic gardening soil and dirt. Anyhow... helping the family out a lot and trying to fix some things. So far, a positive year.

Oh yeah, happy birthday tomorrow Booger. Hope it is a joyful day.

Panic is what it is

2009-02-20T03:40:45Z

Mom and I went shopping today and I had a "mini" panic attack. I was in the last row of books and two people entered the space at once and one bumped into me with their cart, knocking me towards the other. Suddenly I felt exceptionally claustrophobic and overly aware of the pungent nature of the one person's perfume. My heart kind of went into overdrive and I actually got slightly physical in pushing my way out of the enclosed space. I did say "Sorry" to the person I had to bump past, but I needed out of that place quickly... very quickly.

Strange dream

2009-02-19T00:08:18Z

Though there was much more to this dream, it breaks down to a rather short thing, but in the course of the dream it seemed so real :

I was leaving my parents' house and had gotten about a half-mile up the road when I realized I had forgotten something. I turned around and went back... but, when I got to where their little side-street was it was gone. No street ! No house ! I drove for a few blocks each way and could see nothing familiar and went into a panick and I woke with my heart beating pretty fast.

That kind of thing is pretty typical of my driving dreams. I totally hate driving and it makes me nervous as hell, and my dreams reflect the hatred of driving and poor sense of direction I have. Oh well.

Super Bowl Sunday

2009-02-01T17:16:19Z

Well, I have some clothes washed already today, have my food ready for later and am prepared to watch the Cardinals end their run... be it in victory or defeat I will have enjoyed this so much. This city needed them making a run at the big game and the fans are deserving of it.

I hope y'all are doing well in Coldville, J. I know the winter there always gets you down a bit and I hope that you are coping well with it and with school stuff. I miss you.

A beautiful day

2009-01-11T17:01:04Z

It is such a beautiful day that I wish more than anything that I could share it with all my friends. It will hit almost 70° here and the sky is painted with wispy white streaks of clouds across a blue blanket. I have seen another hummingbird today and there is a lot of grackle song and what I assume is a mockingbird in back.

Last night I screamed my throat raw rooting for the Arizona Cardinals. It seems odd to be so into them, but this team truly is a fun team to watch. A rollercoaster ride from the depths of several flat games to winning two playoff games and earning a seat in the NFC Championship game. Wow ! I mean.. Wow !

Well, I am back to my leisurely Sunday. I have one last bowl of spicy chicken chili and about a dozen crackers left, so I know what super will be. I hope that this day finds my friends happy and healthy and counting blessings.

2009 Firsts

2009-01-01T17:11:29Z

Well, here a couple of this years firsts :

• First IM of 2009 - Helena
• First song heard - "Move Over" by Cinderella
• First e-mail rcvd - A junk mail for selling my timeshares
• First meal - Leftover pizza and orange soda (MmmMMmMMm)
• First phone call - Mom (January 3rd)
• First movie - The Stand by Stephen King
• First website posted at - Live Journal
• First book read -
• First scream of joy - The Cardinals beating Atlanta
• First act of kindness - Helped push an out-of-gas car

Summer's last hurrah !

2008-09-25T20:48:49Z

It will be in the low triple-digits here for highs for a couple, to a few, more days, but summer is definitely headed for hiatus. Now for the envy season, the season where this place in unparalleled and I find myself usually sleeping so much better and walking a lot more.

I am now again getting sleep. Not a lot more, but enough to take the edge of the paranoia and allow me to smile and laugh. Thank you to my friends here (both of you) for emotional suipport and helpful thoughts during this time. It has not been pleasant.

That's about it. The premiere of Survivor :Gabon is a heartbeat away and you will likely hear me rant about it here ! Oh yeah, as is The Amazing Race ! Part of me wishes that the season of both, plus B.B., were non-stop with no more than 2 weeks between seasons. It really is something I love.

Seeeeeeeeeya soon my friends. 48-plus 4 days is good ! Really, it is !

Storm city !

2008-08-29T16:17:07Z

If it seems like I have been talking about storms a lot lately, you are right. Going into last night we have had 4.65 inches of rain in this monsoon season. The average is 2.77 or something, and last year we had less than an inch. Well, last night a strange storm came through. When I went outside about an hour before the first part hit the sky was flashing like a strobe-light, without any thunder. Just like I remember seeing before the hurricane I went through in `79 (or 80, I get confused easily). Anyhow... there are parts of the valley with no power, toppled poles, roofs torn up etc. They say some gusts hit 100 miles-per-hour. And they are prediciting rain Sunday too. Unreal how much rain this is for the desert. If Sunday's storm is like last night's there will be major flooding. Heck, the airport was nearly totally shut down and they are still cleaning up the runways because there was so much debris.

Bizarre, scary, scattered dream !

2008-08-22T11:12:47Z

It is 4 a.m. here and I just woke from one of those scary, strange dreams that makes absolutely no sense... I remember only parts but feel like I mist share it. I am calling it "Trail Town" :

A friend and I were in some strange town (seemed European) where this drinking trail leads up through buildings and through businesses and up / down the side of a mountain. My friend had ditched my drunk ass and I decided to go back. The mountain part was hard alone, but, one of the buildings was really hard. The hand rail things were tiny and hard to hold and I had to reach up for the attic door, and I was up like 50 feet in the air trying to get into this trap door and nearly fell. Then shortly after (maybe having gone through two or three more businesses I am suddenly getting chewed out by a young woman for going through the trail alone, as people have been known to die at the one point. The next part of the trail after her was an ice cream shop with stickers all over that I swear said "Do Not Ask Me Any Questions" ! That was the point where I woke, freaked !

That is all for now. I will try to update on my life when I am not so damned scared and shaky. 4 am is a sucky time to be awake and alone and shaking like a leaf. I need to let out some emotions and get some love from Cocoa. Damn.

I am orange today ...

2008-08-14T22:50:00Z

... loud and messy like fingerpaint... !

That song in the commercial has me humming and singing it, and of course thinking about the colors of my life :

The muted grey and white of my purring cat, perhaps the perfect force of peace...

The yellow of the flowers I see when I think of you, beautiful, fragile and yet strong as can be...

The dark blue of the blues when they're not blue at all (can you hear that guitar and the trumpet crying)...

The red and orange of sunrise, bathing the day in hope, giving us another chance at redemption...

The black of hate and envy (whoever long ago painted envy as green certainly did green a disservice), casting shadows into our lives...

The sparkling flashes of heavy metal, myriad and magic, always inside me and always a solace...

The gold of beer on a Saturday night...

The greens and browns of nature, trees dancing, rain hitting the ground and making it muddy, weeds fighting against any and all attempts to eradicate them...

And that colorless morass when depression makes everything seem like it is fading into obscurity and nothing at all can reach me.

Last night rocked !

2008-08-08T16:24:09Z

A little after 8 PM the wind picked up and it was around 30 MPH with gusts well above 40 ! It was coming straight out of the East and just kept blowing. Then rain started coming down in sheets, which it did for a couple hours and the thunder was incessant. It was almost impossible to associate the lightning flashes with a particular clap because it was so non-stop. Wow ! We got over an inch of rain. Needless to say I stayed up later than usual to enjoy what seems rarer each year, a totally awesome storm.

A poem !

2008-08-05T15:57:05Z

"The Ambience of You

~*~

In the breeze that sings
from a dragonfly's wings...
in the kiss of the morning dew

In the full moon's face
in the reaches of space
in the depths of the seas of blue

Down each street I turn
in each thing that I learn
and in all of the things I do

I am truly graced
and completely embraced
by the ambience of you

~*~

Hiya. Having some issues with poetry sites and plagiarists, and my unwillingness to play the "read and comment" game, so I thought I would post your poem here. I hope that today finds you happy and healthy. The recipe went in an e-mail (I just hope I still have the right addy LOL).

I am off to explore. Be good to yourself. ~Jim

Sunday update

2008-07-20T23:29:07Z

Well, Friday I finally got the front yard mowed. The rain had made it into quite the mess, but despite the high temps I attacked it. I hope to get to the backyard soon.

Unable to read much lately. Since finishing the Harry Potter books I find myself unable to really attack anything else. The series was very enjoyable.

That's all for now. Will check in again soon. Seeeeeya !

Hello today !

2008-07-16T20:27:56Z

Not a lot to say. The heat is on its way back and I was supposed to mow my suddenly overgrown yard today and because of severe allergies I did not.

No real update here. Quite frankly just wanted to say hello and go about my day. Seeeeeeeeeya !

After the storm

2008-07-11T15:28:54Z

We had the most kick-arse thunderstorm here last night. Likely around an inch of rain where I am and a lightning show that was superb. The whole house shook as the thunderstorm hit its strongest. WOW ! It got me so energized and left me feeling so cleansed.

Hello again

2008-07-09T00:59:46Z

Well, not a lot happening. But I wanted to check in.

Sunday I was awakened by my cooler thumping away and had to go till Monday afternoon with only a small floor fan to cool my house. It was miserable and I slept only a couple sopping wet hours Sunday night.

I got a neat teapot for 99 cents Monday. Just ran it thru a couple batches of just boiling water to smake sure it is sanitized before I use it. I am thinking it will be stricty for green teas and for teas I wish to double-brew. My other teapot is only for water, as I also use it for hot chocolate, Nissin noodles in a cup, etc. (Yes, my updates ARE action-packed !).

Had a dream to share, but the details are now sketchy... here is what I recall :

I was part of some sort of military team that got caught by an enemy force, methinks Russian. They led us through their HQ, which was essentially a humongous office building with endless cubicles full of folks who stared at us. One of the people staring I recognized, she was a friend and a double-agent. When we managed to find a way to escape after killing one of the enemy guards she went with me to a hideaway where we had safe contacts. Then I woke....

I have a poem written that I need to polish and then it will be on Starlite. After that I will be registring at Writer's Cafe and might start posting there for a bit (not sure... but always checking out different poetry sites and the online communities change so much and so quickly).

That's it for now. Phoenix is a hot bastard lately, but I foresee some nice thunderstorms in the next 7 - 10 days.

Seeeeeeeeeeya !

That 70's Dream !

2008-06-27T16:45:29Z

Okay, first I must preface this dream. It is fairly normal for me to occasionally have dreams that involve TV characters (seldom are they the actors in my dreams, but rather the characters). For many years I would have dreams that included some of the Beverly Hills 90210 characters in it. Anyhow, this is what I can remember about last night's dream. A vivid dream with lots of colors and background stuff that involved two characters from That 70's Show :

There were four of us sitting around, Kelso, Hyde, myself and a fourth person who was not someone I know in real life or someone from the show. Kelso had just left, laughing at me, as I discovered that he had, at some time, taken my nice headphones and put them in the freezer, and they had broken. I was really furious and Hyde was laughing, and then he made it clear that he had seen it all happen and did nothing... AND thought it was hilarious. At that point I yelled at him to get out of my house and not come back. He shrugged and laughed and began to walk out. Then the 4th person said something to the effect that Hyde need not go and it was all no big deal. In response I grabbed a gun and fired it off directly next to his ear. After that he obviously realized that I was not just pretending to be angry LOL. Right after that I was waiting for the cops to arrive when I woke from the dream !

I do have some of the strangest dreams sometimes.

buford_lurch @ 2008-06-01T08:35:00

2008-06-01T15:46:06Z

"... `Cause you can't jump the track,
we're like cars on a cable
and life's like an hourglass,
glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button girl,
So cradle your head in you hands
And breathe, just breathe,
Woah breathe, just breathe ..."

I woke up singing that song almost as if it was self CPR. I could not shake it and it felt so urgent to just keep singing. Not sure what is wrong with me this morning, but that song seems like a lifeline emotionally. I have nearly hyperventilated trying to get the words out.

I am trying to breathe. I am trying to break free so much. I will not share all the failures, but do intend success and do not believe it will be long. I do want to breathe, to fly, to live... and, yes, to love.

"... So cradle your head in you hands
And breathe, just breathe,
Woah breathe, just breathe ..."

An odd little week

2008-05-25T21:24:20Z

This last week was kind of strange. First we have a day where the high peaks out at 110°, then like three days later we have an overnight low in the low 50's and a hailstorm the next day ! I have enjoyed the last three days so much... perfect temperatures and for some reason I have been able to get much more solid and relaxing sleep. Really feels great to get enough sleep.

Not much more to share right now. Did some writing and posted a piece and I feel like lighting a couple scented candles, running a nice hot sudsy foot bath (I have been spoiling my tootsies lately) and indulging in large cup of hot lemon Earl Grey tea. Life is good.

I hope that all my friends are doing well this weekend. Hasta luegos mis amigos.

Wimpy Jim !

2008-05-08T20:41:21Z

Well, this year I really am Wimpy Jim. It has not even hit 100° yet this year and today I removed my baffles and ran some water in the old swamp cooler and cranked it up. Not even 90° today but I was just not enjoying what heat there was, so the cooler is now blowing away. It is barely cooling (the pads are in need of replacing as well as the pump) ,but it is still a noticeable and pleasant change nonetheless.

Today is also laundry day. Yes, I am blogging about laundry... and... Febreeze ! Yup. ! Sprayed a little bit of Stink-Be-Gone around here today (Cocoa is NOT pleased).

A Two Party Night

2008-04-27T03:23:16Z

There are two parties going on tonight, neither overly-loud. In the west end of the house one can be heard, in the east end the other LOL. Other than that tonight is a very quiet night with little to share.

I hope that life finds all of my friends with someone today, or at least able to talk to someone. It is too quiet here lately and I know how much quiet can prey on the mind.

Be well and keep on smiling !